Abigail M. Schilling

In the past seven days, I've managed to watch all of Grey's Anatomy Season 3 (and some doubted there was enough time between release date and Season 4 premiere, psh) and get so sick that I actually went to the doctor. I know.

Let's talk about that first. Because talking about my medical problems to my own audience makes me feel better.

I got a cold last Tuesday all of a sudden. I was fine Monday night and then Tuesday I was all *sniffle* *sniffle*. Ew. I freaked out because I needed to be well for the game show. I was able to minimize the sniffling and nose blowing by Thursday and pretended to be totally well the entire time I was at the show. (PA/Babysitters, all those times I went in the dressing room to 'touch up my makeup' I was really blowing my nose. Haha! Well, and then covering the red some more.)

I was still EXHAUSTED by Thursday night and the 2+ hour drive home (LA, I hate you) did not help. Chipotle did, though, and after winning I watched some Sex and the City and went to bed early. Friday I woke up with a Bad Ass Cough so I bought my favorite cough syrup, Tylenol Cough and Sore Throat Cool Burst Daytime (there is also a night version which is equally awesome).

It worked until Sunday when it stopped working. I was drinking the Kool-Aid and watching the horny doctors and NOT FEELING ANY BETTER. So I called my mom from the floor of the pharmacy and explained to her that I didn't know which cough syrup to get next! Whine whine! We agreed the next step up would be the sister product, Tylenol SEVERE Cold Citrus Burst. I'm not sure if it worked any better.

And when I woke up Monday morning, I couldn't swallow, couldn't breathe, and couldn't get out of bed. Damn you, cold. So I called the big doctor conglomerate and was able to get an appointment that afternoon.

And here is some deja vu:

Me: I got a cold a week ago and it won't go away and I started to get better but then BLAH BLAH BLAH DETAILED ACCOUNT OF SYMPTOMS (see above).

Nurse Practitioner: Yes, well, [gestured to infamous chart] cold symptoms can take up to two weeks to go away. Try some over the counter drugs. Antibiotics don't work on viruses.

Me: I have! They're not helping!

Nurse Practitioner: [lists all OTC drugs I've been taken--decongestant, nasal spray, cough syrup, ibuprofen!]

Me: Yes, I've been taking all those things.

Nurse Practitioner: Well, then, just wait it out.

Me: I can't breathe! The cough! It's ruining my will to live! It got worse! NOT BETTER!

Nurse Practitioner: That's what happens with these things.

I obviously was not going to leave without something, because I've never had a cold this long before and I'm not about to let it stretch out for another week. I have a job! I can't cough like this at work! So the little becca and little Sally inside my head gave me a pep talk and I made my round two comeback.

Me: But my asthma! It is so bad! I can't breathe!

Nurse Practitioner: That is what your inhaler is for.

Me: I take it every hour! And I still can't breathe because of the coughing!

Nurse Practitioner: Oh, that's too much.

Me: I know! That is why I am here!

So, finally, we started to treat my asthma. I was really hoping they would just kick the cold because then my asthma could figure itself out, but if this is the way they want to do things then fine. I would just appreciate the ability to stop coughing and start breathing.

So she diagnosed some treatments and said a nurse would be in to give me them.

You guys! They shot steroids INTO MY ASS. Not only did it hurt like hell after, all tender and stuff, but I woke up at 5 am today because that is what steroids do. I wanna go see if I'm any good at baseball now.

I am better though. The steroids cleared my airways and that stopped the asthma and the coughing. I'm back to using the inhaler twice a day and will hopefully be 100% well by Wednesday. Which is good because ANTM premieres Wednesday.

And here is a conversation with my mom (for fun):

[circa Saturday afternoon]

Me: Guess what! Carolyn and I watched TV from 8 pm last til 2 pm today only breaking to sleep for a bit.

Sally: [disgusted] Why?!

Me: It was that Grey's show.

Sally: But why?

Me: Cause it is awesome.

Although, I will say that the last quarter of it was not awesome. I think successful dramas might be really hard to write for on account of because who else can you make the characters sleep with but each other? I can't help but looking forward to season 4 anyway, it's who I am.

Now I'm going to go bother some other people with my early morning energy. Banana pancakes! Yay!